For you newbies out there who still need a translation guide...here you go:
- I don't know how you do this!
Translation: I'm not going to do this.
- It would drive me crazy to have to read every ingredient.
Translation: what I brought will probably kill your kid because I didn't read every ingredient.
- Will he ever outgrow any of these food allergies?
Translation: it's a pain in my ass to have to deal with this so I hope this isn't going to be forever!
- I just read in/on the [insert paper or website] that they have a treatment for food allergies now.
Translation: This article I happened to glance at confirms that you could do something about them if you wanted to and you must want to keep him "allergic" for some reason. Hypochondriac.
- So many kids seem to have allergies these days! We never had these kind of allergies when we were growing up.
Translation: you're a helicopter parent and your kid's allergies are fake.
- How's he going to get along in the real world?
Translation: you're making your kid into a pansy.
Do you have others you've heard? Feel free to add them in the comments!
Oh, poor thing! I'm sorry your mom won't let you have any candy...
ReplyDelete(Translation: Your mom's a controlling bitch)
She can't possibly be allergic to [insert allergen]. I've never heard of anyone being allergic to that!
ReplyDeleteTranslation: You are full of crap until I see a reaction, and even then I won't believe it was from the allergen you named.